To my daughter – I am her all-time hero, a big giant of a warrior who can defeat any big scary monster with large blue eyes and red dots on its scales… I am her saviour, her guardian angel sent from God.
Yet the reality is, SHE keeps ME strong. She breathes life back into my soul on a daily basis. Seeing that huge smile when I walk in the door from a hard days work. Special Smile. A smile for me. Just me. If only she realised just how much a driving force of energy she is for me. My heart swells with warmth each morning. Why? Because I wake up. I get to see my children again. I get to hug and kiss them and tell them how big and brave they are and tell them well done for all the hard work they put into everything they do to achieve in their young but successful lives.
Daughters. Sons. Children. They are our reason to exist.
Now my youngest daughter, I call her ‘Maus’, has this huge smile and is very delightfully excitable – I mean that’s to be expected right? A child should be happy and permitted to roam free and wild to expose their minds in all ways weird and wonderful to grow that creative mind…I mean, we all did?
Although, as children we probably didn’t see it that way, we are the fortunate ones to witness it daily in our younger selves – our children. I drink in the majestic aura of happiness on display as she is engulfed in the wonders of her latest discovery, her eyes enlarged and fingers engorged in sticky, sparkly goo…which is being rubbed into my curtains…yeah its fun cleaning that out right?
Though it is sweet when they are so young, they are crawling and you lay there on the floor with them, they work hard and make there way to you as you wait for what you hope to glimpse – and bang there it is, right there – the smile, the sparkle off her cute two front teeth. Which, happen to be her only teeth that day…nevertheless, the moment is so special because it is there again, that special ‘just for me’ smile… all the more worth it when it is combined with the pride of seeing her complete her marathon stretch of the dining room… So of course I pick her up and give her the big hug she telepathically demands off me!
Fast forward two years, coming home late one night after work to find her, at four, dozing on the sofa because she refused to go to bed until she gets her special daddy hug… so cute and peaceful as she lay resting, chest gently rising in her peaceful repose. Of course the superhero sweeps her up and holds her tight against his chest, now swollen with fatherly love for the tender soul. She opens her eyes in wonder at why she is floating – then it dawns on her who is carrying her to bed and boom – the smile 🙂
So many sweet & hilarious memories! She is now 9! Yet, when she commands me to be a princess, like she did Sunday gone, then I will be a princess right? You don’t argue with your daughter when she wants you to be a princess! Daughters are a little obsessive about that sort of thing. Determined. So there I am dressed up like a princess, playing Roblox as ‘Princess Maus’ (I roll my eyes).
I see her and I see the struggles of learning of my past, I see the success and the overt feelings of pride when I achieve through her eyes as I was back in the days of youth. I smile deep inside when she laughs at my outlook as I dressed up as a princess. We go into the garden and plant seeds around Lola’s grave (the family cat who sadly passed away last year) and I soak up the tears she sheds as she sobs into my shoulder. Yet when the flowers bloom great emotion explodes from her as she swells in pride over her ‘flower garden’ and begins to name each flower, the most beautiful being called ‘Lola’, which, I admit, brought a tear to my own eye…
I urge you, reader, if you have or intend to have children – give them three things:
1. Confidence to know self worth
2. Strength and wisdom to chase her/his dreams ticking off them goals along the way. Knowing that the only limit they will ever have, is the limit they set.
3. And the signs to know how loved, truly loved, she/he is and to pass the self-same love to their children in turn
I dedicate this to my beautiful daughters.
Final note – my children greatly inspire me to overcome Diabetes in everything I do – and the strength they give allows me to smash diabetes!
Thank you for reading.
Begin at once to live, and count each separate day as a separate life. (Seneca)